Humor Schmunzelecke - Nur Text-Witze 2
- Ersteller Cosmic7110
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Willeswind
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Oder: Haben Sie schon versucht, den Schalter umzulegen ohne zu wissen, ob er dann an- oder ausgeschaltet ist?"Quantencomputer-IT-Support am Apparat.
Haben Sie schon versucht, ihn gleichzeitig aus- und einzuschalten?"
fa66
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Kommt ein extrem übergewichtiger in die konditorei:
»Ich möcht’ gern rumkugeln.« –
»Ja, abba nich hier im laden.«
aao_scout
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Heute habe ich meine Frau auf der Arbeit überrascht und sie, am Schreibtisch sitzend, von hinten im Nacken geküsst. Sie meinte: "Nicht Thorsten, wir sind doch im Büro!"
Mein Name ist nicht Thorsten!
Gruß
aao_scout
Mein Name ist nicht Thorsten!
Gruß
aao_scout
Elvisthegreat
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The best story of the year doesn't give the proper praise and credit for this painful but understandable story as told by a loving wife.
The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for an
answered prayer.
Suzie stood and walked to the lectern . She said, "I have some praise. Two months
ago, my husband Frank, had a terrible bicycle accident and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him.”
You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagined the
pain that poor Frank must have experienced.
"Frank was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain..” We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out
they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Frank's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold it in place with metal staples.”
Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined
the horrible surgery performed on Frank.
"Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Frank is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely.”
All the men sighed with unified relief.
The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say.
A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, "I'm Frank".
The entire congregation held its breath.
"I just want to tell my wife that the word is sternum
The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for an
answered prayer.
Suzie stood and walked to the lectern . She said, "I have some praise. Two months
ago, my husband Frank, had a terrible bicycle accident and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him.”
You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagined the
pain that poor Frank must have experienced.
"Frank was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain..” We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out
they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Frank's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold it in place with metal staples.”
Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined
the horrible surgery performed on Frank.
"Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Frank is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely.”
All the men sighed with unified relief.
The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say.
A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, "I'm Frank".
The entire congregation held its breath.
"I just want to tell my wife that the word is sternum
fa66
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The Club could easily circulate between Thorah (the first edition), Bible (extended standard edition in some parts of the globe) and Qur‘ān (the remake). Makes it a bit more colourful.
Oder die Durchsage am Bahnhof während die Türen von der S-Bahn öffnen "Bitte benutzen Sie zum Einsteigen die gesamte Länge des Zuges"
